#NotJustDPD
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If you don’t know @metalband_exetwitter.com , you won’t know why this is funny 😂
https://twitter.com/metalband_exe/status/1112569547704410113twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
“What’s your degree in?”
“Err… Fine Art”
“Painter? Sculptor?”
“Time-based media”
“Right… And what do you do now?”
“Something something involves a lot of critical thinking… Ok I’m a web developer”
https://t.co/M3byS2Wv8it.co ❤️ 2 | 🔃 0
In reply to: @wildoniontwitter.com @wildoniontwitter.com People are always going to eat breakfast 🍴
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A thing what I wrote…
https://twitter.com/ExtraLRG/status/1112992349037191168twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
Wednesday April 3, 2019 - 05:43
Delivering the Leeds Weekly News. I was paid 1p per paper. My round took about 3 hours, and I delivered around 400 papers. I think this was probably 1985-6 ish.
https://twitter.com/jodyvance/status/1112748181761060865twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
Wednesday April 3, 2019 - 06:27
In reply to: @4m3thy5ttwitter.com @4m3thy5ttwitter.com This is a still from naked lunch, right?
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Wednesday April 3, 2019 - 07:18
RT @GeorgeMonbiottwitter.com : Today we launch our very exciting campaign for a massive global programme to draw down carbon from the air through ecolo…
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Wednesday April 3, 2019 - 07:27
I’ll take “Things that will be conveniently forgotten once building starts” for $100
https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2019/apr/02/londons-tulip-skyscraper-given-planning-permissionwww.theguardian.com ❤️ 1 | 🔃 1
Wednesday April 3, 2019 - 13:19
https://twitter.com/EnglishHeritage/status/1113373088450863104twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
Wednesday April 3, 2019 - 18:56
😂
https://twitter.com/BBCBreaking/status/1113491070443302914twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
Thursday April 4, 2019 - 13:01
Anyone putting Piers M organ in his place is good. This one is better than that… It uses FACTS!
https://twitter.com/EmporersNewC/status/1113547733300842497twitter.com ❤️ 1 | 🔃 0
Thursday April 4, 2019 - 22:44
RT @RewildingBtwitter.com : We’re so excited about #NaturalClimateSolutions - a ’that’s so simple why didn’t we do it earlier?’ way to fix the #Climate…
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In reply to: @richardosmantwitter.com @richardosmantwitter.com @BootstrapCooktwitter.com Wait, which one is voting for Eggxit ? I’m confused.
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I’m not sure I can near to read this. Perhaps you should though.
https://twitter.com/lukeoneil47/status/1114169751390097409twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
In reply to: @poshaughnessytwitter.com @poshaughnessytwitter.com Oh God, mine too. I think we should setup a support group. #needyAppliances
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If you follow this woman’s advice, it makes you a petty, insincere person too.
Thanks are a formality, and a cultural norm that not everyone subscribes to. Don’t be a racist. Hire people that will do a good job, and then thank them.
https://twitter.com/jessicaliebman/status/1114160523581501440twitter.com ❤️ 1 | 🔃 0
Find someone that looks at you, the way this museum dummy is looking at that boar 😘🐗
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In reply to: @LASTEXITshirtstwitter.com @LASTEXITshirtstwitter.com Tilda Swinton.
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Congratulations @StarlingForBiz @StarlingBanktwitter.com , you beat @monzotwitter.com to it. I’m now going to seriously consider moving my business account away from the execrable @HSBCUKBusiness online service.
https://t.co/6tDcdnIfqZt.co ❤️ 1 | 🔃 0
In reply to: @BootstrapCooktwitter.com @BootstrapCooktwitter.com Somebody must have done Cubby Broccoli… Right?
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@jutertwitter.com Wear the foil like an animal skin trophy headdress. Rub it in their sad faces!
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I call this piece, “Still life, with AT-ATs and the Beatles”
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Wednesday April 10, 2019 - 09:59
Seems appropriate that I’m tweeting this… Just sign pls
https://twitter.com/Rob_Mills_Art/status/1115871888360837120twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
Wednesday April 10, 2019 - 10:05
Meeting Alick after a skillsmatter talk was a pivotal moment for me. Realizing that financial literacy was critical for people of any age. I look forward to my daughter getting her first experience with an @ospertwitter.com card. 💳 ✊
https://twitter.com/osper/status/1115902239489634304twitter.com ❤️ 1 | 🔃 0
Wednesday April 10, 2019 - 10:08
Just because it has the word ’liberal’ in it, doesn’t make it good kids. Read the nice man’s article.
https://twitter.com/GeorgeMonbiot/status/1115865565481062401twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
Wednesday April 10, 2019 - 23:59
In reply to: @AdaRoseCannontwitter.com @lady_ada_kingtwitter.com I remember seeing my first Acorn Archimedes in the flesh, and thought… This changes everything… Oh… But still not as good as the Amiga 😊
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Thursday April 11, 2019 - 23:11
In reply to: @HuwLabourLeftietwitter.com @HuwJonesLabour I’m quite fond of Craven. Perhaps Sniveling?
No, on second thoughts Abject is good too.
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Thursday April 11, 2019 - 23:11
In reply to: @4m3thy5ttwitter.com @4m3thy5ttwitter.com Is that the name of the dragon?
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Thursday April 11, 2019 - 23:33
In reply to: @LASTEXITshirtstwitter.com @LASTEXITshirtstwitter.com But can we see it in the original Polish?
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Teeth!
https://twitter.com/BBCInOurTime/status/1116579606440497152twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
In reply to: @leobarnestwitter.com @productoven @cineworldtwitter.com AND it doesn’t look like an actionable element. Also, I tried to book today, and wondered what the ‘upgrade’ was… Turns out you can’t find it without canceling the booking… So I didn’t upgrade, even if it HAD suited me.
Not only is it a dark pattern, it’s a shit dark pattern.
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Jesus fucking Christ. I was willing to give the whole season 2 of #starTrekDiscovery the benefit of the doubt, but e13 was literally people just standing around tearfully staring through the lens flare.
Fuck dark star trek, Fuck sweary, ‘sexy’ star trek. ToS and TNG FTW.
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seconds later, an ad finally arrives at my browser, but…
https://twitter.com/swodinsky/status/1116763906716966912?s=19twitter.com ❤️ 1 | 🔃 0
In reply to: @type__errortwitter.com @type__errortwitter.com Is it about to be replaced by a branch of The Range?
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In reply to: @kosamaritwitter.com ❤️ 2 | 🔃 0
In reply to: @toychickentwitter.com @kosamaritwitter.com (I don’t know this either)
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RT @RewildingBtwitter.com : Unsure what the #ExtinctionRebellion stands for? Here’s a good starting point 😀
https://twitter.com/ExtinctionR/status/1117653875669045248twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
In reply to: @richard_littlertwitter.com @richard_littlertwitter.com Basically I’m imagining the final round of Crackerjack extended to 24 hours. Thousands of kids, millions of cabbages and a hauntological Stu Francis.
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In reply to: @BigB0bbyTtwitter.com @BigB0bbyTtwitter.com The building may (probably) will be rebuilt in some form or another, but the cathedral was also home to some pretty irreplaceable art and cultural artefacts. 😶🙁
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Tuesday April 16, 2019 - 14:00
@netflixtwitter.com this thread, so hard. I often avoid using Netflix because it’s impossible to talk about what you want to watch as it’s playing trailers for stuff I will never watch.
It’s far from friendly for me, and who knows what it’s like for people with attention issues or epilepsy
https://twitter.com/codepo8/status/1117875618522091521twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
Wednesday April 17, 2019 - 12:34
Why is it so f’ing hard for almost every courier company to deliver to my address? Just had the depot at DPD tell me the exact GPS that their driver had been to… yet the driver didn’t seem to know he was at the wrong address! This happens every. single. time. #notJustDPD
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Wednesday April 17, 2019 - 12:39
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Wednesday April 17, 2019 - 12:54
In reply to: @heydonworkstwitter.com @heydonworkstwitter.com @bruceltwitter.com Nah - he just really hated that CSS article. ;)
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RT @codepo8twitter.com : The Guardian’s nifty old-article trick is a reminder of how news organizations can use metadata to limit misinformation https:…
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In reply to: @AnnaBailey_Elytwitter.com @AnnaBailey_Elytwitter.com @ElyCycletwitter.com Stating you don’t have the licenses for the map, and ‘you’ll put out your plan to consultation’ is a long way from convincing me that you have any intent to make good on this promise. Give us a verbal description of the map, perhaps?
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In reply to: @AnnaBailey_Elytwitter.com @AnnaBailey_Elytwitter.com @ElyCycletwitter.com What does “over time” mean?! Sounds a lot like “never”.
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In reply to: @elisabetheverytwitter.com @elisabetheverytwitter.com @AnnaBailey_Elytwitter.com The problem with this is that, because of poor public transport in Ely in general, residents will not be willing to demonstrate this desire, because they’ve had to invest in personal transport, i.e. A car, probably for each working adult.
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In reply to: @toychickentwitter.com @elisabetheverytwitter.com @AnnaBailey_Elytwitter.com Then what tends to happen is that the only people that are inclined to use bus services are pensioners, who have the time and incentive (free bus passes) to use what’s available.
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In reply to: @toychickentwitter.com @elisabetheverytwitter.com @AnnaBailey_Elytwitter.com Then, bus services are then designed to optimise for those people, so timetables tend to move towards afternoons and shopping, when most working people need early mornings and evenings, transport links and out of town industrial park destinations.
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In reply to: @AnnaBailey_Elytwitter.com @AnnaBailey_Elytwitter.com @ElyCycletwitter.com Looking at the page you shared, the first bunch of ‘improvements’ are designed to encourage car use, and most move services out of the centre of Ely. Not one mention of sustainable and public transport. Let’s not pretend you have this anywhere near your agenda.
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In reply to: @AnnaBailey_Elytwitter.com @AnnaBailey_Elytwitter.com @ElyCycletwitter.com “If we have a strategy” doesn’t sound like a plan, and you don’t have a policy without a plan to make it happen, it’s just words. Much like the oh-so-important bypass, that had sustainable transport options that evaporated as it was built.
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@HuwJonesLabour this thread… I don’t know how @ElyCycletwitter.com maintain their calm.
https://twitter.com/ElyCycle/status/1119144370316333056twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
Saturday April 20, 2019 - 00:02
In reply to: @4m3thy5ttwitter.com @4m3thy5ttwitter.com Throws 8 packets of Uncle Ben’s microwave golden rice onto the bed
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Saturday April 20, 2019 - 00:08
In reply to: @brianlerouxtwitter.com @brianlerouxtwitter.com JIRA.
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Saturday April 20, 2019 - 11:28
In reply to: @ChloeKerr_twitter.com @ChloeKerr_twitter.com “Often found at the pub”, well at least we know that her moral compass points indoors.
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Saturday April 20, 2019 - 17:45
@LouiseMoschettatwitter.com @isobelgmorris @CliveKSemmenstwitter.com , I’ve managed to find your Twitter addresses, but no links to local policies you might support with regard to Ely. Help a voter out?
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Saturday April 20, 2019 - 21:53
In reply to: @amnestyelycitytwitter.com @amnestyelycitytwitter.com Sure, because the rise of the far right is the fault of immigrants.
Definitely nothing to do with the inherent injustice of neo-liberalism, followed by 10 years of Tory austerity.
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https://twitter.com/RewildingB/status/1119709863184146434?s=19twitter.com https://twitter.com/ExtinctionR/status/1119714752261951488twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
This is seriously lovely work. @ageingandcitiestwitter.com @benaustwickarttwitter.com
https://twitter.com/codinghorror/status/1119927652159115264twitter.com ❤️ 1 | 🔃 0
Update your emojis, kids. They keep you safe.
https://twitter.com/rorysutherland/status/1120020966388662273twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
Wow. A Victory. In a war. I hadn’t realised I’d been conscripted by either side, as I both cycle AND drive a car.
Fuck you @thesundaytimes. If I could not read your rag any harder, I would do so.
https://twitter.com/ormondroyd/status/1119975307933515778twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
In reply to: @EbenUptontwitter.com @EbenUptontwitter.com Yeah, it’s appalling to be so fearful of the end of life on this planet that they feel compelled to do something about it. To try to get people to listen. Especially in a non violent way. Appalling.
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RT @ExtinctionRtwitter.com : The #ExtinctionRebellion Regeneration Game
Today, 3 PM
Marble Arch
Our Performing Arts Department invite you to join a s…
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In reply to: @EbenUptontwitter.com @EbenUptontwitter.com Parliamentary democracy is designed specifically to think in the short term. Make promises, get elected, achieve nothing. Protest is the engine that creates the vibration that moves the needle of democracy, but in this case, may be too little too late.
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Tuesday April 23, 2019 - 07:48
“These upstarts, nurse. We should have never allowed the good book to be translated into heathen tongues. Prepare my hair shirt, I’m going to a meeting in the City…”
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Tuesday April 23, 2019 - 08:04
How very dare they? The media is not the place for holding power to account, it’s the place for fawning adoration of hypocrites, on the off-chance we might get a knighthood or an investment tip.
https://twitter.com/MrTCHarris/status/1120399954391052288twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
Tuesday April 23, 2019 - 08:25
In reply to: @4m3thy5ttwitter.com @4m3thy5ttwitter.com Yeah, not everything from history translates well into the present day.
But also, fnar fnar. “Sperm”
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Tuesday April 23, 2019 - 08:30
@Logo_Geektwitter.com - saw this. Mind blown.
https://twitter.com/y2k_aesthetic/status/1072867440223080449twitter.com ❤️ 1 | 🔃 0
Tuesday April 23, 2019 - 08:50
In reply to: @toychickentwitter.com @4m3thy5ttwitter.com If you’re interested, check out the Wikipedia entry on spermiceti - fascinating and disgusting.
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Tuesday April 23, 2019 - 17:06
Hey - I made you a playlist!
https://lrg.io/playlists/lrg.io ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
Tuesday April 23, 2019 - 22:20
Perhaps @GaryLinekertwitter.com can help. I’m not one for footsport, but is it usual to have a ‘2nd team’? Just asking, as I’m from Leeds.
https://twitter.com/piersmorgan/status/1120785478595301377twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
Tuesday April 23, 2019 - 22:42
Something something something, business business. Oh… Wait… It’s me, in an alternative sensible universe.
https://twitter.com/ExtraLRG/status/1120721560548052994twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
Tuesday April 23, 2019 - 22:46
..and you get a bay window, and you get a bay window, and you get a bay window. EVERYONE GETS A BAY WINDOW! 🎉
https://twitter.com/doctorow/status/1120802053385797633twitter.com ❤️ 1 | 🔃 1
Wednesday April 24, 2019 - 13:23
In reply to: @remtwitter.com @remtwitter.com Firebase cloud functions?
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Wednesday April 24, 2019 - 13:34
In reply to: @simplybastowtwitter.com @simplybastowtwitter.com It’s a Gaussian distribution. Once you get to the extreme end of the curve, the butler does it for you.
(The other end, the shower is just perpetually dripping) 🚿
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Wednesday April 24, 2019 - 18:35
In reply to: @wildoniontwitter.com @wildoniontwitter.com @zacharyparadistwitter.com Oooh. I’m really surprised it doesn’t happen more often. I can think of some pretty close calls in my time at big consultancies.
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Wednesday April 24, 2019 - 18:56
My first 5 jobs:
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Babysitter
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Spy for Future publishing (unpaid)
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Paper round
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Head lamp assembler
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Glass collector
This is once of those Twitter things, right?
https://twitter.com/rachaelminott/status/1120946828760047616twitter.com ❤️ 1 | 🔃 0
Wednesday April 24, 2019 - 22:33
In reply to: @steinytwitter.com @steinytwitter.com Screwing the pig 🐖🤵🏻
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Wednesday April 24, 2019 - 22:38
I don’t mean to be rude to anyone else, but @choochoobottwitter.com is my new favourite bot on Twitter.
🚂🚃🚃🚃
Woo woo!
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Thursday April 25, 2019 - 22:31
I’m assuming his plan to equalise gender disparities in the NHS is to reduce the total staffing to one, poorly paid female ‘mega nurse’ and have a very very long queue.
https://twitter.com/MattHancock/status/1121301249968754691twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
Saturday April 27, 2019 - 00:19
In reply to: @alicegoldfusstwitter.com @alicegoldfusstwitter.com May have to consider using modulo to decide whether to respond to email. If [Inbox count]%0 == 0 , then I’m at inbox zero 🎲🎲
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Saturday April 27, 2019 - 00:49
In reply to: @richard_littlertwitter.com @richard_littlertwitter.com For more information, please pre-read.
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Saturday April 27, 2019 - 00:54
In reply to: @toychickentwitter.com @alicegoldfusstwitter.com Ugh. Buggy tweets. I disown this algorithm.
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In reply to: @heydonworkstwitter.com @heydonworkstwitter.com Bambi-curious?
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In reply to: @pointlesslettrstwitter.com @pointlesslettrstwitter.com We’re even on Twitter.
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If I could have three wishes for my best friends, they’d be:
❤ A long, happy and healthy life
🌼🐝 A planet for all species
🤖🍞🎪 Fully automated luxury communism for all.
You ain’t never had a #friendLikeMe
https://twitter.com/Disney_UK/status/1122779054837514240twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
In reply to: @benaustwickarttwitter.com @benaustwickarttwitter.com Infrared?
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Might be late, but this is lunch… 🍜
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Shit. #DemThrones is TENSE!
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In reply to: @benaustwickarttwitter.com @benaustwickarttwitter.com It looks great on architecture in bright sunlight, but obvs not much use on painted detail IMHO
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In reply to: @iamdevlopertwitter.com ❤️ 66 | 🔃 0
Is no-one going to mention the sweet alliteration in this headline?
Though “Rod Rosenstein resigns after rocky relationship with rampant racist, Ronald Rump”, would have nailed it for the lolz.
Aaand, now I’m imagining Scooby Doo saying it.
https://twitter.com/BBCBreaking/status/1122977869037297664twitter.com ❤️ 0 | 🔃 0
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Tuesday April 30, 2019 - 00:20
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🔥🐉🔥🔥🔥🔥 🔥 🔥 🔥 🏰 🔥 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 🐉❤️ 1 | 🔃 0
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Cover image: